"Birthdays may be difficult for me." "I want you to take the initiative in opening conversations about my birth family." "When I act out my fears in obnoxious ways, please hang in there with me." "I am afraid you will abandon me." The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the twenty complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love--that he must grieve his loss now if he is to receive love fully in the future--that she needs honest information about her birth family no matter how painful the details may be--and that although he may choose to search for his birth family, he will always rely on you to be his parents. Filled with powerful insights from children, parents, and experts in the field, plus practical strategies and case histories that will ring true for every adoptive family, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew is an invaluable guide to the complex emotions that take up residence within the heart of the adopted child--and within the adoptive home. From the Trade Paperback edition.
Discover the Secrets to Understanding the Unique Needs of Your Adopted Child-and Becoming the Best Parent You Can Be
Author: Sherrie Eldridge
Category: Family & Relationships
Do I have what it takes to be a successful adoptive parent? Does my child consider me a successful parent? Will I ever hear my rebellious teen say, “I love you”? What tools do I need to succeed? In her groundbreaking first book, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew, Sherrie Eldridge gave voice to the very real concerns of adopted children, whose unique perspectives offered unprecedented insight. In this all-new companion volume, Eldridge goes beyond those insights and shifts her focus to parents, offering them much-needed encouragement and hope. Speaking from her own experience as an adoptee and an expert in the field of adoption, Eldridge shares proven strategies and the moving narratives of nearly one hundred adoptive families, helping parents gain a deeper understanding of what is normal, both for their children and themselves. By first strengthening yourself as a parent, you’ll be able to truly listen to your child, and to connect with him on every level, by opening the channels of communication and keeping them open forever. Then you and your child can grow closer through the practical exercises at the end of every chapter. Discover how to • be confident that your role in your child’s life is vital and irreplaceable • pass on the legacy of healthy self-care by assessing and regulating your stress • communicate unconditional love to your child • talk candidly with your child about her adoption and her birth family • teach your family how to respond positively to insensitive remarks about adoption • connect with other adoptive families–and build a support network • plus learn to become a “warrior” parent…settle the “real parent” question…cope with emotional triggers–what to do when you “lose it” . . . celebrate the miracle of your family…and much more From the Trade Paperback edition.
Twenty Things Adoptive Kids Wish devotional gives adoptive families encouragement as they seek God to work through the emotions unique to their family. Daily 365 inspiring devotions are filled with scripture and authentic insight into the heart of adopted children. Powerful prayer prompts help you navigate through difficult topics such as rejection, the missing faces in their lives, and much more. As you pray together through these tough topics, you will become the greatest prayer warrior for your adopted child and God will knit your hearts together in His love.
As an adoptee, do you have mixed feelings about your adoption? If you do, you are not alone - adoptees often experience complex feelings of grief, anger, and questions about their identity. Sherrie Eldridge is an adoptee and adoption expert, and in this book she draws on her personal experiences and feelings relating to adoption as well as interviews with over 70 adoptees. Sherrie reveals how you can discover your own unique life purpose and worth, and sets out 20 life-transforming choices which you have the power to make. The choices will help you discover answers about issues such as: Why do I feel guilty when I think about my birth parents? Why can't I talk about the painful aspects of adoption? Where can I gain an unshakable sense of self-esteem? Sherrie also addresses the problem of depression among adoptees and common dilemmas such as if, when and how to contact a birth mother or father. This fully updated second edition includes new material on finding support online, contacting family through social media, and features three new chapters, including Sherrie's story of reuniting with her birth brother, Jon, in adulthood.
The Adoption and Safe Families Act (ASFA), which became law in 1997, elicited a major shift in federal policy and thinking toward child welfare, emphasizing children's safety, permanency, and well-being over preserving biological ties at all costs. The first edition of this volume mapped the field of child welfare after ASFA's passage, detailing the practices, policies, programs, and research affected by the legislation's new attitude toward care. This second edition highlights the continuously changing child welfare climate in the U.S., including content on the Fostering Connections Act of 2008. The authors have updated the text throughout, drawing from real-world case examples and data obtained from the national Child and Family Services Reviews and emerging empirically based practices. They have also added chapters addressing child welfare workforce issues, supervision, and research and evaluation. The volume is divided into four sections—child and adolescent well-being, child and adolescent safety, permanency for children and adolescents, and systemic issues within services, policies, and programs. Recognized scholars, practitioners, and policy makers discuss meaningful engagement with families, particularly Latino families; health care for children and youth, including mental health care; effective practices with LGBT youth and their families; placement stability; foster parent recruitment and retention; and the challenges of working with immigrant children, youth, and families.
Written especially for adult adoptees working through complex feelings about being adopted and who are considering finding their birth parents, this book is also an invaluable resources for adoptive or birth parents who want to gain a better insight into their child.
Meet Lucie - she is a rambunctious, inquisitive, seven-year-old girl who was adopted! Lucie has lots of questions about everything. When Lucie's pregnant Aunt Grace and Uncle John come to visit, new curiosities bubble into Lucie's mind. What does the baby do in there? Does he eat? That night Lucie has an amazing dream, that her birth parents are a king and queen who live in a castle. She knows she grew in her birth mother's tummy, but if her birth parents lived in a castle, why didn't they keep her? The next day, Dad helps her to make an amazing discovery - he tells her how to find a special connection with her birth parents, and how you can too! Forever Fingerprints is a heartwarming, fun story written for children aged 5-11 which uses an everyday experience to embark upon a gentle exploration of some of the difficult questions and feelings commonly expressed by children who are adopted. Adoption expert Sherrie Eldridge also provides a valuable 'Parent Tools and Activities' section, with ideas for creative activities and suggestions on how to explore issues such as belonging, identity, self-esteem and connection.
What prospective adoptive parent wouldn't delight in this incredible mixture of research, practical tools, and reflections from fellow adoptive parents? Dr. Uekert speaks with the wisdom of a coach and the heart of a mother. I consider this book a must read for those who are adopting internationally. -Sherrie Eldridge, Author of Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew Ten Steps to Successful International Adoption is the definitive adoption guide. It is a concise, inspirational workbook that will help you make educated decisions and move forward in your adoption plans. Learn how to successfully complete an adoption by finding the best country from which to adopt, securing the services of a top-notch agency, paying for adoption expenses without going broke, sailing through the home study, traveling to a foreign country with ease, crafting an adjustment plan for your child, and building connections to your child's birth culture. Carefully orchestrated action steps will lead you toward your ultimate goal. In addition, you get: