If you can't say something nice... say it in emoji. Shock your friends and family with this brilliantly offensive collection of emoji put-downs and comebacks. With this handy guide, the endless potential for a punishing emoji burn will be opened to you like never before – far beyond just relying on the classic middle finger symbol. From everyday insults to brutal Shakespearean zingers, classic movie put-downs to the best ‘your mum’ jokes, this is your complete phrasebook for the ever more savage world of emoji insults.
If you can't say something nice... say it in emoji. Shock your friends and family with this brilliantly offensive collection of emoji put-downs and comebacks. With this handy guide, the endless potential for a punishing emoji burn will be opened to you like never before - far beyond just relying on the classic middle finger symbol. From everyday insults to brutal Shakespearean zingers, classic movie put-downs to the best 'your mum' jokes, this is your complete phrasebook for the ever more savage world of emoji insults.
Manage the Volume, Reduce the Stress, Love the Results
Author: Dianna Booher
Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers
Category: Business & Economics
Business communication expert and bestselling author Dianna Booher shares practical wisdom on how to write effective emails that get results and how to organize documents to gain control and increase your productivity. Today, most business writing is email writing. We handle even our most important customer transactions, internal operations, and supplier partnerships solely by email. Yet many of us still struggle to write emails that get results. And we often are so overwhelmed by the sheer volume of emails that we feel as though we're in email jail! How we handle email has a large impact on the trajectory of our career. Emails can build or destroy credibility, clarify or confuse situations for our coworkers and customers, and reduce or increase security risks and legal liabilities. This book will help you master your emails and stand out as a clear, credible communicator. After all, clear, credible communicators become leaders in every industry. With more than three decades of experience analyzing emails across various industries for corporate clients, Booher offers guidance on how to identify and stop email clutter so you can increase productivity while improving communication flow. In this book, you will learn how to: • Compose actionable emails quickly by following Booher's philosophy of Think First, Draft Fast, and Edit Last • Write concise emails that get read so you get a quick response • Organize a commonsense file storage system that helps you find documents and emails quickly to attach and send • Present a professional image when you email prospects, customers, and coworkers • Be aware of legal liabilities and security risks as you send and receive email
'FRANK, FILTHY and FEROCIOUSLY FUNNY' Sunday Mirror 'I loved every HONEST and HILARIOUS second!' Carrie Hope Fletcher 'Made me CACKLE OUT LOUD on every single page' Daisy Buchanan Lush (adj.) Very rich and providing great sensory pleasure (Oxford English Dictionary) (n.) A habitual drunkard (Oxford English Dictionary) Gabby and Emma have been best friends since primary school in Wales. Emma has a stable job, a nice home and has just got engaged. Gabby has had a succession of disastrous one-night stands and awful jobs since drama school . . . and she has just been diagnosed with scurvy. She has one year until the wedding to pull herself together and prove to her friends and family that she can be a proper grown-up. Described by Caitlin Moran as 'filthy, immoral and incredibly funny', Gabrielle Fernie's blog, loveisa4letterturd.com, catalogued her life as a struggling actress with a taste for gin. Here, in her first book, she shares her most raucous stories with eye-watering honesty. It is a laugh-out-loud account of a young woman trying to find her place in the world. Readers love Lush: 'Best book I have read for a very long time! Absolutely hilarious!' 'Thanks for making me laugh out loud on the tube like a weirdo and for making me miss my stop more than once' 'Moments of true absurdity partnered with genuinely touching stories of friendship in your twenties makes for an excellent read' 'I would recommend this book to anyone who's ever doubted themselves; as a little reminder that no matter how ridiculous your life seems to have become, Gabrielle Fernie's has always been hilariously and irrevocably far, far worse'
Riva Corley needs a girlfriend. Not because she wants one, but because her boyfriend, Benton, is pushing her to kiss a girl in front of him. Afraid of losing Benton, Riva agrees to try, but she never expects to find a girl she actually likes and wants to kiss for her own reasons. Daisy Mejia has stayed closeted for all of high school so far -- it seems pointless to come out for a kiss that's destined to go nowhere. Daisy also has no desire to put on a show for Riva's boyfriend. But she's had a crush on Riva Corley forever, and Daisy can't pass up this chance. Before long, what starts out as a bad idea begins to look more like a relationship. Soon, Daisy must decide how much trouble she'll put up with, and Riva has to figure out what it means when she's falling for another girl.
'I'm just a nitwit girl who's sort of stumbling through life learning that we all have our own roads to walk - but that it's still valuable, and rather lovely, to hear about other people's journeys...' Filled with honesty, wit and wisdom, Fully Functioning Human (Almost) - part memoir, part life guide - will show you the real Melanie Murphy: warm, fun, positive, honest, a girl who's got this whole adult thing down. Almost. Irish YouTuber Melanie Murphy regularly chronicles the ups and downs of her life on her popular channel, discussing topics such as sexuality, skincare, social media and self-esteem. Now, in her first book, she looks with her trademark humour and down-to-earth honesty at the experiences that have shaped her. From learning how to manage her online life, to giving up on the idea of perfection, living with anxiety and the lessons she has learned about relationships, Mel shows us that difficult times can teach us the most about who we are, and by learning to value ourselves, we can overcome whatever life throws at us.
What's the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One has a moustache and smells of fish and the other is a walrus.It's better to let someone think you are an Idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.You have two parts of brain, 'left' and 'right'. In the left side, there's nothing right. In the right side, there's nothing left.Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?He is so old that he gets nostalgic when he sees the Neolithic cave paintings.You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."I don't engage in mental combat with the unarmed.Don't you love nature, despite what it did to you?Your gene pool could use a little chlorine.Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ.